Praise and glory to God our Father on this sunny Sunday! Getting ready for worship! I have had my Holy Spirit Tears already today (most days), doing my devotion, but better yet, preparing my 19 year old to head back to Minneapolis to college today. He has grown so much in maturity and faith, and we saw a huge spurt this Christmas break. He was once an artist, making dark artwork, some of it demonic. I had tried to be open to his artistic ability and tolerated this to a point, but this spring I decided to take a stand and have it removed from the house. Also in our talks in the last few months, I believe the Holy Spirit has helped me penetrate his soul enough to get him to understand the power these articles possess. He now seems to have a sense of peace. I am hopeful his future artwork will show this. Our world is so full of demonic iconic tshirts and album covers, along with many more TV shows and movies showing ghost chasing. A little less subtle is the demonic force I believe coming out of mainstream television shows, highlighting most every episode swirling around death and murder. If you think about television, actual keep track of how much of it is positive and uplifting. The Today Show I watch no longer as well. I don't call news that which lets me know which Hollywood figure is bankrupt or divorced. It's not my business. I also don't find it healthy to see newscasters relaying the news, when it is obvious what their personal opinion is. I have seen too many politicians slaughtered on air. And don't get me started on Saturday Night Life and the filth it has become.
A future blog coming will be all of the instructional statements the Lord has planted on me during dreams and during awake times. I plan on making a piece of artwork out of my Father's words to me. It is such an incredible thing to finally identify that statement that comes into our hearts. What a relief for me to connect the relationship, due to washing of the Word daily, with that loving God's voice. This is how I picture the relationship, and I hope it helps you: I imagine I am a quilt and the thread that makes the pattern on the quilt is His Word, weaving in and out of the fabric. I am held together and decorated by His Word. It puts Him in me.
One of the most personal and beautiful statements the Lord put on my heart is "Melissa, put my beautiful music in your ears". This was on September 18, 2011.
At that time, I was still struggling with being afraid at night. I was having nightmares. Demonic nightmares at times. Also, paranoid nightmares. Things like black birds picking at me, broomsticks coming through my window at me and having my loved one, Joe, walking in my bedroom and scaring me. (this is not possible, he doesn't live here). I say this with all confidence in the Lord. I am of sound mind. I actually praise Him many days in my devotional time for having a sound mind. It is wise. My history of nightmares is lifelong. My history of insomnia goes back to age 4 when I can first remember. And fear of the dark goes back to that beginning of my memories. What a shame. What a struggle for me.
The demonic nightmares I don't feel I need to share at this time. I do not do this for entertainment or to titillate you. I do it, as I feel this blog is an ongoing testimony of what real people are like, and what real people that turn their lives completely over to Jesus Christ are really and truly like. I am still a real person with struggles. The Enemy has used my sleep and fear of the dark against me, and I feel now as I mature in Christ that it is his thorn to keep me from feeling as powerful as I need to be. He does this to many, and I assure you, that you are not abnormal. Keep following my blog to hear my explanation of what is really going on, that which you cannot see, good and bad. The good is triumphant over the bad. Recognize the bad, the evil, then stomp it out, with the power of the Word of God under your belt. You really cannot tromp on those snakes unless you arm yourself with Holy Spirit power. Man vs. evil without Christ? Not a victory. I tried it as a lukewarm Christian. One who was a perfectionist, trying to outwit at every turn, evil. And evil kept sneaking up on me. Tricky Devil, he is. The downfall of my life was the time in my life after leaving an abusive husband. The leaving wasn't the sin, it was the sin that my life fell into, as a single woman. The worst fall of my life, from 2006 to 2009. Lord, Jesus, praise you for reaching Your hand into the pit to grab me, clean me off, renew me, and show me how to obey and why. Praise!
I was having intense trouble sleeping and finding peace in the dark in my 100 year old home from late May 2011 until approximately October 2011. This trouble all started within the month that I proclaimed out loud to others that I was born again. My boys also felt this strange fear in our home.
It is hard to recognize at the time, the timing of events. That is why a prayer journal is essential. It does two things. It is a tool to make your relationship deep, through prayers and really just talking to God, through hand writing. But as well, it helps you date the events in your life, and associate them later with the big picture. You can highlight in a different color, answered prayers as I do. I also highlight revelations that I have. You see cycles. It is all so cool. God is so cool and artistic, himself. He certainly is not boring and rigid. Join in this one-on-one through a prayer journal.
I actually was at work and writing in my prayer journal when the Holy Spirit planted on me, to put His beautiful music in my ears.
To me, at that time, it meant that I could sleep better if I bought a Sony Walkman or Ipod to listen to Christian music during sleep to block out distractions that were leading into lack of confidence in the dark. So, I did buy a Sony Walkman and listened to our local contemporary Christian music station. It did work and it was comforting.
But, actually now I see many meanings in what the Lord was saying in this one statement.
1) Yes, fill your heart and soul with good things, including positive uplifting music.
2) But, as a musician, praying for direction with my hobby of piano playing, I wonder if He is instructing me to use my music only to glorify Him. I have been praying for direction with my music business, which allows me some extra income and opportunities to perform. I used to be a church pianist for years in the Catholic church. I enjoyed it, but it was different than the music provided in my new churches I attend. I had only started listening to contemporary Christian music about a year ago. I didn't know many songs. But, if I was going to be a church musician, I better learn the music. Now, I am learning the music! And I continue to pray that He will call me, if it is His will, to be a church musician. I bought two piano books this weekend, and have actually mastered 80% of it! (my left pinkie is very sore) All of the praise goes up! Only through Him, can I play so well. What a new twist and turn, understanding our gifts are only from Him.
3) I find myself waking up from sleep, when the alarm goes off, with a wonderful Chris Tomlin type song many days! Some days I actually am singing as I wake up. And guess what? This is praising God! All of the scripture injected into these songs is great ammunition against spiritual warfare!
4) Also, I find that the more I include reading scripture and listening to good healthy Christian music, it is all that is on my mind. Not much time for that nasty demon voice telling me how I screwed up, etc. Or who is ugly or different. Be gone! Fill your morning with scripture, and fill the rest of your day with healthy music, no TV, and be alert to every encounter to spread the Good News of our Savior. You will find there is little time for unhealthiness. I will later blog of the opportunities I have in each and every day to evangelize with co-workers and even perfect strangers. Remember, if you are born again, they will sense you are different. You emit the light of Christ. They don't exactly know what makes you different, but they are watching you, and want to examine what you have that they don't.
Oh, Lord, again, please bless this blog. If you do not bless it, give me discernment to remove what is not in Your will. I will obey. Amen.
2 Kings 3:15 But now, bring me a harpist. While the harpist was playing, the hand of the Lord came upon Elisha.
Psalm 81: 1-2 Sing for joy to God our strength; shout aloud to the God of Jacob! Begin the music, strike the tambourine, play the melodious harp and lyre.
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